In last week’s blog, I addressed whether the biblical truth of Love and Respect is too simplistic for marriages that are in serious trouble.
This week I share a testimony that beautifully communicates how love and respect, though simple, can powerfully transform a troubled marriage! Read what can happen when just one spouse submits themselves to the transforming power of Jesus Christ and acts in obedience to His Word.
Wow – there is POWER available to us if only we believe!
This woman writes:
Several years ago I went from being a nominal Christian to a full-time lover of Jesus. However, my marriage was falling apart. My husband disliked being around me. He didn't talk to me for days on end. He said numerous times that we were too different and that once the kids (4 & 6 at the time) were grown we would need to separate.
Since my marriage was in tatters, I read what God had to say. Being schooled into the feminist camp the words submission and submit in 1 Peter 3 and Ephesians 5 were very difficult to swallow. However, I knew that I could not argue with the first real Love that I was experiencing and gave over to 1 Peter 3:1. I had not been putting my husband first. I had to start focusing on home more. I tried to honor my husband’s words when he spoke.
The love of Jesus was so full in me that I really was completely fine. I was in a euphoric place for about 6 months after I became a Christian while my husband was watching me and wondering when it would end. I had a reason to submit: to win him, as 1 Peter 3:1 said.
After a while his demeanor changed towards me - he started to like me, said kind things to me, wanted to be around me.
Then I heard a piece of your conference on the radio and it blew me away. I was flabbergasted. It was God's amazing timing. The whole submit thing became easier to swallow once you described it as meeting a man’s need for respect. Then it all started to make sense. I was no longer doing it without knowing. I started to use the word "respect" around him and it solidified his turn-around. Respect was the HUGE key to him letting down his guard to trusting me and thereby trusting Jesus and letting Him in.
She then describes a moment when she needed to draw the line with him on his pornography viewing. She did so respectfully but she made it clear that she could not continue in the relationship the way it was. Eventually he broke and allowed God complete control of his life.
She continues:
My husband is now completely changed and won over. I don't even RECOGNIZE the man I married. He is COMPLETELY different. After 13 years I can finally say our marriage is truly like a dream. It is unbelievable how tender and fun and honest and caring and loving and joyful and playful and kind and intimate and generous and forgiving and sincere and giving and wonderful our marriage is. It is a MIRACLE. My husband has embraced Jesus I truly believe as a direct result of Ephesians 5:22 and 1 Peter 3:1.
Friend, are you resisting complete surrender to Jesus Christ? I submit to you that there is NO problem that is too big for God! Love and Respect, applied with a heart that is completely submitted to Christ, is powerful enough to change your life!
2 comments:
This was just lovely to read. I'm not yet married, but I have been putting what I have learnt into practice with the guy I am with. I've notice that by drawing closer to God, and respecting my beau as a man, things are much more pleasant. It is a difficult thing when you start out, but in time it became second nature,
Thank you so much for posting.
I specifically searched for a post that deals with pornography. I have been married 12 yrs and knew about his "occasional" problem since I found out 6 months into the marriage. I died inside that day. Although we both believe marriage is forever, and we have seven children, I couldn't think of one way that I respect him. Not one. I do feel so very unloved, but yet I am not sure I want the kind of love he has to offer, if any, because of his addiction. He is a nice guy, in the military and is deployed for the 6th time as of right now. But, when he gets back, I plan to try this respect thing... Otherwise I don't know how much longer I can tolerate going to bed alone while he stays up on the computer. Is there hope for people like me/us?
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