Most
of us already knew that.
Most
of us also know that to change a behavior we need to develop a new habit. In
other words, “practice makes perfect.”
Any
new behavior feels strange – even “wrong” at first. But if we repeat the behavior over and over,
it eventually becomes a habit and feels normal.
How long this takes is up for debate, but it’s safe to say it’s probably
longer than most of us would like.
This
goes for changing our behavior in marriage too. Do you really want to get off
that Crazy Cycle and onto the Energizing Cycle with your spouse? Start a new habit of doing the right thing,
right now. Let today be your turning
point.
A
few weeks ago in my blog entitled Christmas Chaos, we heard from Katie about how applying respect during the holidays
was a turning point in her marriage. Eight years later, Katie’s consistent behavior
has led to long term change! We often
stress the importance of consistency in honoring God in your marriage, and this
story of how respect became a lifestyle really shares our heart and hope for
each of you.
The understanding I gained from Love
and Respect served as the turning point for our marriage. I am happy to say that my husband and I celebrated
our 12th anniversary and have a strong, thriving and solid relationship. The specific family challenges that I
described 8 years ago are markedly better; and as new challenges come up in our
marriage we handle them with a much lower degree of conflict. Our marriage is mostly one of unity and joy,
and when it is not, it prompts me to take a look at what I am not doing. The answer
is almost always me showing a lack of respect for my husband, or not leaning on
God instead of my own strength - or a combination of the two. But now I can pretty easily identify what I
am not doing, and it's completely within my ability to correct that. Sometimes my sin nature and stubbornness just
takes me a little longer!
The Love and Respect teachings have
helped me to build a much deeper and stronger relationship with God. I have seen the incredible power of getting
instruction from Scripture and taking the step of faith to follow it, even when
you don't initially understand it or believe it will help. I know now that I will ALWAYS benefit from
learning more about God's word and putting it to use in my life. God's grace, as a result of my faith, has
blessed me more incredibly than I ever might have guessed. I know that will just keep getting better! (Katie)
This dynamic
couple has continued to make an impact in their church and community, bringing the Love and Respect Live Conference to their church, mentoring engaged and
married couples, and even sharing the principles of respect in their
workplace.
Because
Katie decided to do things differently one Christmas, countless lives have been
changed!
What will be
your turning point in 2013? Change can
start with a simple decision to do things differently in your marriage. Then, be consistent.
As we begin
a new year, our thanks to all of you who are acting in obedience to Ephesians
5:33 and making a difference in the world!
Happy New Year!
