February 9, 2009


Many of the couples who attend our Love and Respect marriage conferences have good marriages.

So why do they attend if they have good marriages? Such folks keep on investing in those marriages. They invest the time, effort, and finances to maintain a satisfying and stable marriage. For example, people are traveling from 24 states to attend our Charlotte North Carolina conference. Wow!

Anything of value and which brings us value needs upkeep. A baby grand piano needs tuning if we want Beethoven's Sonata No. 14 to enrapture us. A BMW needs an oil change if we wish to purr along Highway 101 on the coast of California, enjoying the winding journey among rolling hills, green pastures, grazing cattle, and blue ocean. And a healthy 50-year-old person needs a medical checkup if he intends to pursue life, liberty and happiness.

The greater the value of something or someone, the greater the willingness to invest. When a child has a life-threatening illness we do not think of the money.

How important is your marriage?

Did you know your marriage, in the eyes of God, is the longest lasting institution to which you belong, apart from the church, the body of Christ? Contrast that with the educational institution you attended for a limited number of years or the institution that employs you until age 65 (until the financial crisis and it will be 85!). Yet, think of all the money you put in on education to get a degree and think of all the time and effort you put in on your job to get a paycheck.

Is your degree or paycheck more important than your marriage? Those who have good marriages would say, "Absolutely not!" That's why they attend a Love and Respect marriage conference, read the Love and Respect marriage book, go through the Love and Respect workbook, or host a Love and Respect DVD in their home with a small group. They keep investing hours, energy and finances in their marriages.

I love what Solomon said, "Buy truth... get wisdom and instruction and understanding" (Proverbs 23:23). One commentator said, "buying the truth suggests spending whatever energy or financial resources are necessary to acquire truth..." (Bible Knowledge Commentary).

Buy truth? Yes. You did for your formal education everytime you wrote out a tuition check!

Does this mean anyone who buys truth becomes wise? Solomon addressed that point. “Why should fools have money in hand to buy wisdom, when they are not able to understand it?" (Proverbs 17:16 TNIV). A commentator wrote, “A fool is so simple he thinks he can buy wisdom. He comes with money in hand, but fails to realize he lacks the one resource necessary for gaining wisdom: a genuine, heartfelt desire for it” (BKC).

Not everyone who buys truth becomes wise. When a fool buys truth, he remains a fool. When a wise person buys truth, he becomes the wiser.

During these financially tough times many who attend the Love and Respect marriage conference profoundly impress me. I am overwhelmed by the couples attending from 24 states this weekend in Charlotte. During this economically stressed season, these people are making sure their marriages do not die. They intend to experience marital harmony, enjoy the marital journey, and pursue happiness together. These people are declaring, "Our marriage matters to us. Though we should put more time, effort, and money into it than we actually do, we are committed to investing in the longest lasting earthly institution that God created. We made a vow for richer or for poorer. Even though finances are tough this is one investment we will not neglect."

Those of you who are traveling from the 24 states, I salute you! See you there enjoying your dividends!

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